"They'se men in this here country[0] that'd lie for 50 cents, when the truth'd get 'em a dollar." R.T. Johnson
[0] He was referring to northern Arkansas.
When Raybourne had known me for a few years, he felt he needed to tell me that because he had come to realize that I am a truthful person. That I would tell the truth to people and still thought that they were being honest with me. He was worried that I would be hurt by the habit of his neighbors. At first I did not quite know how to take what he was telling me. It took some time to learn it but, he gave me clues to open my eyes.
"We see things not as as they are, but as we are."
I have chosen to remain honest with those around me. Lately I have had to make some hard decisions in my business dealings. Honesty will cost me money day to day, but in the long run I am hoping that my customers will accept my integrity. When I have to turn down a request that I know is not on the up and up some people think that I am just holding out for more money. I'm not.
"Just saying it doesn't make it so."
I do not understand the psychology of lying. There are three basic ways to lie, first, to tell something you know to be untrue. This is the most blatant and the first step on a long slippery slope. The why of this is different for each person. Maybe they feel that by controlling the other person they are more likely to get the results they want. Maybe they don't feel the person to whom they are speaking is worthy of the truth. Maybe they do it out of spite to hurt someone. Even wishful thinking can be lying.
"Beware those who would deny you Information. For in their heart they dream themselves your master."
The second way to lie is to know that someone has misunderstood what was said and to not correct the situation. Probably for the same reasons.
"Half of writing history is hiding the truth."
These two behaviors often lead to the third, someone repeats something they believe to be true, but it is not. An innocent victim of other people's bad behavior is left with a bad reputation and confused hurt when the truth does come to light.
I have heard it said that the only thing that liars gain in the long run is to never be believed. Does a person who has a habit of lying really think that the people around them can't tell? Because everyone lies at some time in their lives we can have a small glimpse into the why, but there is a world of difference between being someone else's unwitting dupe and plotting mischief against other people. The saddest of all, is the person who indulges in both the first and second methods of lying to manipulate the actions and thoughts of others. Old joke: "How can you tell when a politician is lying? When his lips move." We feel the same way about the used car salesman. Is this really how a person wants to be viewed?
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2 comments:
Then there is the fourth..... lying by omission. To not tell someone something that is true...just because you don't want to hear them. Not because you think you will hurt them... not because you think it will cause harm...
There are more ways to lie than that.
You can tell part of the truth. Only telling the bit that suits you is a very good, or a terrible way to lie, depending on how you look at it :) and it is what led to the "whole truth" part of the oath taken in the witness stand of 'tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth'.
Another way to lie is tell the truth, but tell it so badly, in such a shifty way, that the listener can only conclude that you must be lieing.
Any others?
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